I have been dreading Christmas 2020 for three years.
When I signed my divorce decree, the agreement was that I got the first three Christmas mornings post-divorce. And that starting in 2020, my ex-husband and I would start alternating.
2020 seemed so far away at the time, and three years would give my heart time to heal and prepare to not have my kids sitting at the top of my stairs on Christmas morning, something no mother should ever have to prepare for...
But goodness, God's timing --
Who would've known (other than He Himself!) that in Christmas 2020 I would be engaged to the love of my life, the man who would help me through a holiday season I've been anxious about for years, the man who would help come up with the idea to do 3 Christmas mornings in a row.
So on 12/24, we woke up and acted exactly like it was Christmas morning with my trio.
On 12/25, it was just the two of us, and we had our own, perfect Christmas morning in a quiet house, a house that didn't even feel too quiet because it was filled with the hope of us.
And on 12/26, we woke up and acted exactly like it was Christmas morning once again with his four.
3 Christmas mornings filled with snuggles and food and sugar and new toys and slowing down and movies and games and baking and pajamas and griddling and Nintendo Switch and loud and quiet and gorilla bread and snacks and messes and memories.... so many memories.
Next year, we will have one Christmas morning. All nine of us, in one place. And I cannot wait. <3
But also? I loved our 3 Christmases, and saw God's promise of hope in the nooks and crannies of each and every moment.
Behold.
And Merry Christmas(es)!!
