But, I knew we needed a fresh start. We'd been through a tough year, lots of trials and tribulations and joy - yes, there was joy - but so much worry and heartbreak. T and I both wanted, needed a change of pace, a change of scenery. And picking up and moving to a new state was how we were going to wipe our slates clean.
And now, here we are - in a town that is home. In a house that I love. With T working a job he so enjoys, and working hard so that I can fulfill my current dream of being a stay-at-home mom. And oh the friends I've made here - friends who have welcomed me with open arms, friends who are already family. Friends who I never knew I missed until I met them.
This time last year, we were waiting for results from my repeat loss bloodwork, results that we hoped would tell us why we'd had to say goodbye to another baby, another beating heart. And if you told me this time last year that this time this year I'd spend the afternoon napping with my Everette asleep on my chest, I may not have believed you.
You see, I'm great at being thankful during the good times, during the times when the blessings are obvious and plentiful. But I have a hard time being thankful at all times... I have a hard time realizing the blessings are always plentiful. I tried so hard to stay faithful and hopeful during the trials and tribulations we faced, but I cannot lie and say it came easily. There were many dark days, many days that I didn't understand, asked questions, and was not gracious or grateful.
And now? Now I look at my sweet Everette, my miracle, my fighter, my Rocky - and I cannot imagine my life without him. And I realize that had we not traveled through all of those trials, those tribulations - we wouldn't have this little boy. We wouldn't have him, without Him.
T and I had a quiet Thanksgiving today, just the two of us and our two children. And we had many moments where we locked eyes and smiled and understood the unspoken.
We are so lucky, so blessed, so thankful.
We've also talked a lot today about how it all seems too good to be true. How do we get to live this life? What did we do to deserve this?
It's very humbling, looking into the eyes of my daughter and my son, and realizing that I get to be their mom.
And I will never, ever take that for granted.
So today, I am thankful. And tomorrow, I will continue to be thankful. Because I'm realizing now more than ever that a faithful heart is not just thankful on Thanksgiving, but always. <3